9.09.2010

Constellation: Di Brich | Stand Up To Cancer



Cancer is insidious and it knows no boundaries. SU2C was created as a bridge to gap the inadequacies that are currently seen in the fight against all cancers. It is a "place" for those to retreat to and build courage, trust and the added zing needed in the fight against cancer with donations going directly to research. Too many people have been lost to cancer and without the proper funding and channeling of those funds it will continue to wreak havoc on the lives and the lives of the families of those that suffer from cancer. That is the purpose of SU2C.


Di was a blessing to me and her life was cut short because of this awful disease.

View Di's star below and donate in her memory if you are able to.  We need to take a stand against cancer.


Stand Up To Cancer - TUNE IN ON SEPTEMBER 10


SU2C has a wonderful area where you can donate and then name a star for someone.
Check out this link for Di's star!



It's a lovely way to honor someone who touched your heart...
Peace.
Cath

9.03.2010

Survival and A Broken Heart

"Things don't go wrong and break your heart so you can become bitter and give up. They happen to break you down and build you up so you can be all that you were intended to be."
                                                                                                     Charles "Tremendous" Jones

I think that this quote exemplifies to give us strength to move forward and onward and to push towards our goals.  However, I in no way will ever be "healed" from the loss of Di.  I think that are parts of our soul, our brains and our bodies that find ways to cover up the devastating parts of our lives and package them deep within to allow us to move forward.  I think this is what we call memories.  Memories and what we remember as memories are usually happy times in the colloquial sense but nonetheless, we also have those painful memories that force us to whip back into the dark spaces of our thoughts and imagination and recollections.  But, we have to find a way to survive after loss.

Don't get me wrong, I have good memories of Di, but there is that painful place that I can see myself sitting on an empty bench with tears in my eyes, grieving.  I think that the good memories take turns with those sorrowful and sad memories on a continual basis.  Change, flick, fade to black, resurface, click all in a loop that sometimes it is hard to shut my eyes for fear that I will experience the loss all over again.

For years, I worked with traumatic brain injury survivors who delegate their days based on their injury.  Some survivors experience short term memory loss and others experience long term memory loss.  The most common loss with these survivors is short term memory loss and it is brutal and unnerving most of the time for them.  Their mind continually 'replays' their last thoughts, actions and spoken words which forces them to repeat their lives over and over again.  But, they are survivors.
I believe that this is how our minds process death, we go over and over and over again the loss, the despair, the memories, the reminders, the smiles, the hugs, the tears and the rememberance of those that we have lost.  It replays like a broken record and takes us 'back' to the place our mind was at when it all happened. 
If only there were a switch that we could turn off, go back to normal like it was before the loss occurred...

My heart is still broken from the loss of Di...




The people we meet form the foundation of our lives that when built upon allow us to bloom and blossom in ways that we never would have anticipated.