"Things" That Remind Me of Di

There are so many things and places that remind me of Di.  She had so many things that she loved and she passed so many of those things on to those that she loved.  I remember so many times talking to her and wishing that I could get all those things for her that she dreamed of but really now, those "things" pale in comparision to the only thing that we have left; memories.

Altoids and the smell of them and the clank of the rectangular container opening and closing... Biolage leave-in-treatment... Crane Coffee alas no longer around... Delice Bakery alas no longer around either... Sunflowers... Hair Cuts and Colors... John Denver... NPR... Loving Those You Love With Vigor... Laughing... Printmaking... Papermaking... The Last Cigarette... Trips with the kids... Pork Roast with Rosemary... Smiles... Hugs that wrap around you like a blanket... Knuckle cracking... Fighting for parking at UNO... Death & Dying Course... Rearranging my apartment furniture... Washing Machines... Tacos & Tostadas... Coffee & mug warmer... Natalie Merchant... Storytelling... Hair Art Project...

Impact AND Choices AND GRIEF

What is the impact of a soul?

What is Grief?

Grief.

It is a 5-letter word that engulfs us all in one way, shape or form. 

Is it the sheer realization that in some tiny way as a tiny speck on this big planet that we have accomplished something, made something of something and are now done with our deed?  

I truly believe that there comes a time in everyone's life that meaning becomes more than just living, loving and laughing and turns into purposeful intentions.  We all must have the living, loving and laughing but we feel the need for more.  We all need more time.  We all want more time with that one special person or those special people in our lives that bring meaning to it all. 

More time to grieve. 

More time to make an impact.  

Choices are ours alone to make and how we chose to move forward and make a difference, an impact in the short time that we have on this great planet is all steeped in our own life, drive, emotions and motions. 

A soul, a person, a place, a thing all makes an impact in how they are portrayed, utilized, worked, molded, formed, watched, given, symbolized, created, drawn and wished upon.  

We all have the ability to make a difference and make an impact and some of go through life hoping to make an impact, some don't realize that they can make an impact or have the ability to do so.  Others, work their entire life to make someone smile, feel special with friendship and love and hugs and worthwhile impact.

Peace.

Love.

Cleansing Soul Wishes.

Always.

Cat

Birthday and Sweetness Always...

 Happy Heaven Birthday Di. 

Today marks the birthday of Di and another year past without her here to celebrate the goodness of sweet family, friends and treats.  I know you are celebrating up there and I keep hoping that I've been good enough to one day join you but as always I have my doubts.  

Love to you and love to those all over that love you so very much...

Cat

Go Easy....Please

We all need the time, the forethought, the afterthoughts, the true moments to find in the paragraphs of our lives to work through all that we see, feel, need, want and dream.

On this day, the eve of my dear Di's birthday where she would have been 59, I am remembering her again...like I do frequently.  She really never leaves my mind, my side, my memories of her stay rooted deep in the spaces of my heart.  She lives in my soul as if she was still here and I can hear her saying "oh Cath!" or how I can still feel those squishy and love filled hugs that she gave on a very usual basis.  She made me feel who I was supposed to be...just me. 

On this birthday eve, I am going to go easy on me and I want everyone to go easy on themselves because life is so tough and so hard and so sad and so full of hate and is in such a disarray.  

The changes just over the past 18 months have been significant.  We all just need to go easy, take the path of less resistance and take the time for the breaths, for the love, for the reasons that we are us and us are we.  

The newest Adele single is out and it's eloquently titled "Go Easy On Me" and is quite fitting for my few words this evening.  

Peace, Love and Please Go Easy on your self, your heart and those you love and those that love you...

Cat

November 15, 2019 Marks 10 years since Di Left Us...

I remember that day like it was yesterday.  Yes, I forget what happened last week, but that chance meeting over 20 years ago in a library with a red-headed girl with a huge orange purse, I remember that well.  That was my once-in-a-lifetime friend I was destined to meet.  My Di.

Di I loved you even before I met you in that abnormal psych class on that brisk fall afternoon in the 90’s.  With your bright orange purse, your persistent character and your wide smile that mimicked your intense soul.  You sought me out, I floundered among the students and you put me at ease that day and every day after that.  People are placed in our life’s trajectory that we are meant to know, meant to be with, meant to laugh with and meant to love for more than a lifetime.  Your brilliant red hair and your intriguing consensus on the meaning of everything brought me into your space and you shared vehemently your life, your family’s life and your soul with me at every juncture in the road.  I will be forever grateful for newfound introductions, special talks, life lessons, acceptance of my soul mate, the love of adventure and your calming sense of being a human.  And of course, your hugs.  I miss those so much.

I’ve been waiting a long time for a sign, my dear.  That little pinch to let me know that you are watching over me and us and them.  We talked about that in your last days, we laughed about it in your last days.  I sent kisses and love and good karma and vibes to you even from the outside of those cement walls of that place you spent your last days in.  I made it part of my daily ritual to drive past and send you my love, my peace and my reverence in any way that I could.  Even though we all know it didn’t work out the way that we wanted it to and at times my feeling of the energy that we tried to surround you with that day was all for nothing.  But I know better.  I know better, now.  It was for you, but being selfish human beings, it was all for us and that is the way that you would have wished it would be, so we wished that too for you and we produced it for you and we were so very proud of you staying tough against that ugly green cancer monster that eventually gobbled you up.  But we learned well and good and heartily from the blank canvas that you left us to continue our journey on.  You had already painted all that you were going to paint and you had readied us for a world without you. 

I’ve still not deleted Di’s phone number from my home phone and I still have her email contact in my email along with saved emails.  I have need to keep my connection “open” with Di, a desire to be there but I know that it’s just a form of the ongoing grieving process and by keeping that connection available, I know that I share this as a commonality with others who have had great loss in their lives.

I only wish I could have her voice saved, recorded, frozen in time.  Does that sound morbid?  Does that sound unnerving? I would really give so very much to hear that boisterous red-headed rolling rambunctious round of laughter….and to hear it at the very thought of it, with a recording would be like she was still here. If only I would have recorded her the day that she sang for me from her hospital bed.  She sang like an angel and I was awestruck watching and listening to her.

I know you’ve probably been busy with chatting, educating and laughing in that gleeful contagious Di way.  I look to the sky, the stars, the wonders of the world and know that you are always in our heart, soul, mind and thoughts.  Your little sprinkles of love and laughter have survived and are always working in the background and sometimes in the foreground of our lives.  I know that your physical presence is gone but you have left an everlasting seed that continues to flourish and grow and impact the lives of so many every single day.  

I think that some people who knew me before we lost Di are still today a bit dumbfounded that I “still” grieve from her loss.  Loss is a unique journey but one that takes us from one realm and catapults us to another realm where the things that we do each day are magnified and hold real and true and vivacious memories.  Di you were magnanimous and we carry that with us each and every day.

What EE Cummings wrote is so very true, Di:

"Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart.  I carry your heart; I carry it in my heart."

I will forever carry your heart in my heart, my dearest Di. 

Peace.

Love.

Hugs.

Realization.

Onward and Upward.

Creating, Keeping and Loving Memories…

Cath

Happy Birthday Wishes For Another Year

Happy Birthday Girl...

How did we know that the date of your last birthday would mark the last 744 hours of your life?  The last 44640 minutes of the last month of your life?  The last 2,678,400 seconds in that last month of your life? 

We didn't and honestly it's probably best that WE DIDN'T KNOW THIS.  

I think you knew.

I remembered we talked about 'after' and how it would consume me and my life and I'd be frozen like I was before....for so very long. 

It's now been almost 10 years since I opened that box that I would put the birthday card that I would buy for you every year.  I'd keep it in that 'safe' place and then take it out ever so gently, caress it and then think for a moment about what I would write.  Then I would stop, think again and feel sad because I just knew that one day I would not be going to buy you a card again.  

The last time that I stood in the card aisle, I did cry.  

I cried because I was scared, I was scared that I would not pick the 'right' card to celebrate you and that I may not get the chance to buy another the next year for you.

I was right; I do NOT like to admit that because I like to function on learning something everyday, something new, something cool, something different.  I HATE being right about many things, especially when it was that I would not be able to ever give you a birthday card again.  

So sad 

It has been approximately 20,820 days since your last birthday. 

Today you would have been 57 years old, my dear. 

I can hardly believe that it has been so very long.  

Forever remembered, never forgotten, my dear sweet Di 

Peace, love, light...

Cath

The Things We Leave Behind...

The things left behind…

When she left that warm November day, I know that she did not know that it would be the last time that she looked around, smiled at the photos on the mantle, checked to make sure that she had everything that she would need for a short stay as she felt the door handle for the last time ever.

Now there are things. Things left behind. Things that meant something. Things that are a reminder of something. Things that she loved. Things that she enjoyed. Things that made her smile and laugh. Things that brought tears to her eyes. Things that she watched with tender loving care. Things that she made. Things that she envisioned. Things that are things for just the sheer pleasure of being things.

These things are just things. But, they allow us to “touch” those that we miss whenever we want to or when we need to. Things that we can touch. Those things are tactile and important and an integral part of who we were, who we are and who we are going to be.

I have learned to drink my coffee without cream; black…2 sweet ‘n low packets and that’s it. Di would be proud since she always made fun of me and my foo foo coffee creamers…

Love, Peace, Hugs Always and Forever,
Cat

The Misconceptions of the Pink "Wave" Yelling Breast Cancer Prevention

There have been many articles and opinions negating the commercialism of breast cancer prevention and this article does a fine job of explaining the facts, the misnomers and the pros/cons of early detection, treatment and support.

The article touts "the feel good war" depicting all of the PINK products that are available and the unorganized "version" of early detection/early screening. 

One quote in the article from Peggy Orenstein who described her second diagnosis in heart wrenching terms "Just like that, I passed again through the invisible membrane that separates the healthy from the ill".  I felt that exact same way when Di's cancer 'came back'....as I am sure she felt too many times to count. 

Additionally, the term "Pinkwashing" has surfaced and it is very informative, especially during this month of October where we see garbage trucks, NFL, NBA, WNBA, Nascar and other sports that tout their "Pink" saying it is all in the name of breast cancer awareness. 

How aware do we need to be at this point?
How aware are we at this point?
Does it do any good or does it harm those that are suffering?
Do funds go where they are supposed?
Why is this disease not fought and done with all the technological advances?
Should we blame the drug companies and their personification of the almighty dollar?
Di and I talked about this over the many years that she was fighting that good fight and many times she was so embroiled in anger that "there wasn't a cure yet -- because the drug companies and healthcare DON'T want to cure it, but instead keep throwing money at the cause to keep them in business. 

Take a look at this article; interesting, from 2018 but still very relevant.
I read it, I think of Di.
I read it, I get mad.
I read it, I miss Di.
I read it and I can feel the tears welling up behind my eyes full of sadness.

metavivor.org posted an article by Anni Aluise

Peace, Love and Squash the Pinksters PLEASE 

Cat

Light and Brightness

An odd choice in a movie that I'm not sure if Di would have liked; but it's a favorite of mine.  In the movie, Bladerunner, Tyrell tells the character Roy:

The light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. And you have burned so very, very brightly.

Di always lived life with compassion, spontaneity, goodwill, spirit and kindness.
Di burned very brightly and her smile still continues to light my way in the world through my remembrance of her.

Happy wishes to that light of Di that burned twice as bright but only burned half as long as we all wanted it to. 

Peace, Love, Much and Many Hugs...
Cat...

Airplane and Flying and Those EARS !!

No, I'm not talking American, United or any of those other airlines or planes you think of when you hear those words.  Even though I would have thought that there would have been flying involved the first day that I met him. 

Those EARS.......Oh my gosh.......I was just mesmerized by the scope of his ears!
His personality was uncanny; he would hang out, rarely bark at strangers (well, really no one was a stranger that came to Di's and if they were, they fast became a non-stranger), and always gave unconditional love.  He surely had Corgi in him!

I'm sure that Airplane and Di are soaring through the skies together and Spike and Spur are curled up on some fluffy cloud watching the world go by......I just wish I could find a picture of Airplane to post....

But, Jozi sure would have liked to have met Di and Di would have loved to rub those ears like she did Airplane's. 

Peace....
Love....

Puppy kisses....

and hope...

Cat

Moving On.....

When we lose a loved one we never get over it completely, but we get to a point where we are back to feeling like ourselves (even if we still have that little part of our mind that remains a little gray). When we first lose someone it is an unbearable shock that's hard to believe. Once the shock wears off the grief swoops in and over us and can sometimes make it feel as if we can't even breathe. Grief is a monster that we can't kill or tame all at once. It is a monster that, when met over time with moments of a neutral, pleasant, or joyous nature, will start to shrink and retreat, leaving behind only a small footprint. We need to accept that that footprint will always be there, but as the weeks and months go by the grief does die down a little at a time.

What we may be surprised to discover, though, is that far sooner than we would have thought we do laugh again. We have those moments when we feel pretty much like "the real us" with an open sore that stays in our life. There is no doubt that we continue to battle our thoughts and fight off either tears or the overwhelming horror that come with tears we can't fight off. Still, it is surprising how soon so much of our days is spent feeling reasonably normal. I suppose what happens is that even while we are consumed by, and in the grips of, that overpowering, huge, monster that is grief; time's force continues to pull it away from us; and the resilience of a heart that has loved so much eventually prevails.

Sometimes others will worry that we're not "moving on", and they can even make us feel as if we should stop talking about the loved one if we talk about him a little too much, or get rid of his belongings faster than we have, or simply start a new life sooner than we appear to be. My advice to the grieving would be to stay strong and stay true to yourself. Deal with your grief that way you need to, and don't feel pressured by others who would deal with it differently.

Difficult as it is to believe when we have just lost someone, we all just keep moving on, whether or not we want to, and whether or not we appear to be. If you ask how to get through your days, rather than ask how to move on, time will move you on, and your heart will will tell you when to take another step.

When I first saw you, Di....I fell in love with you and knew that you would be my "one". 

Peace,
Love,
Light,
Presence,
Hugs...
Cath

Fork In The Road Causing Contempt (Dishes)

As I look at the fork in the road on my travels of life, I see that the plate is missing and the spoon has went into hiding due to the fact that the knife is torturing him because he can’t find his way through the sea of contempt and sadness.
I need to find solitude and peace and nourishment and stillness and ……
A PURPOSE to move forward.

Peace, Love, Kindness, Healing...
Cath

Happy Birthday Di

Happy Birthday in Heaven Di

Peace and Love,
Cath

Walt Whitman quote

That's all I have to say...
Cat

Wishes Floating Above

Birthday Wishes Sent To Heaven

Today marks another birthday for Di

Wish we had Di here to celebrate, to chat, to laugh, to walk briskly in the cool autumn air

But, we do not

So I will be sending messages to her through my memories 

The day is supposed to be beautiful and I will glance into the sky and look into the clouds for a glimpse of what may be something I can take away and with me for the moment

I'm going to leave this post on this note... 

Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe...

Peace... 

Love... 

Hugs...

Cath 

Remembrances and Writing and JUST Breathe

Today I have been working on my Thesis and was writing my Dedication(s) and included Di (of course) and remembered so many things and thoughts and silly things and one thing in particular I remember from that FIRST DAY that I met her in Abnormal Psych ..... I know! .... of all places was when I asked her if she was struggling with the course and she tilted her head and said

"Strugglin' .... ME?  Never, I'm relaxing and keeping the stress to a minimum, can't you see my meditation cloud over my head?"  THAT became our little mantra for THAT course.....OMG and right now while I'm knee deep in research and review and contemplation and that wanna-throw-my-laptop-and-anything-nearby I have to laugh and think back to when Di had that "power" to engage me and MOTIVATE ME to keep keeping on and do it with such panache.

Oh how I miss that! 
So, I'm not going to forget to breathe through this entire process and I'm gonna keep looking up and pointing to that little teeny itty bitty meditation cloud that sits right above my head (keeping the stress to a minimum) just like Di told me she was doing that very first day I met her in that redhead fashion of hers that she did SO VERY WELL.

Love you much Di and still miss you much more than ever,
Cat

Sending Prayers

Through all of my blog writing and reading there are some things that catch your attention and the story of Joey & Rory caught my attention with the blog that Rory has been writing over the years as a document of their lives.

Today I am sending prayers to Joey & Rory and their sweet Indiana because Joey is in the battle of her life.
Please visit Rory's blog and send your prayers to this family...
http://thislifeilive.com/

This is a song that was done three years ago by Joey & Rory and it touched my heart.....may Joey be granted peace knowing that her legacy will live on in the hearts of so very many....

"When I'm Gone" - JOEY+RORY music video (from their album His & Hers) from Hickory Films on Vimeo.

Sending Peace,
Sending Love,
Sending Kindness,
Cat

Remember that Memories last Forever ♥

So Missed and So VERY Loved

Today is the day that we lost Di November 15, 2009

I may not be posting as frequently as I did in the past with live getting in the way but with excuses aside, Di is never far from my thoughts.






I've found that is "ok" to move along the winding road alone but it takes bravery and determination and I have to admit that at times I feel lost and alone and weary.
Bravery is a BIG word, it takes a lot to say that word and even more to LIVE that word everyday.
Di was brave, she lived bravely, she loved bravely, she worshiped bravely and she echoed bravery to all that surrounded her.  Di planted her roots firmly and she lived with convictions even along her tough road in the fight of her life against the cancer that invaded her body.

Over the years since we lost Di things have changed and there are so many more people that I have recognized that are fighting the fight of their life, just as Di did.  Such an insidious disease that takes our people, our kin, our loves and literally our breath away.

If I could just have 'one more' moment with Di...that has been my feelings since we lost her.  I found this songwriter who wrote from the passions of his heart and soul about 'One More' when he himself was diagnosed with cancer and his songwriting abilities were poised to not just write a song but instead to write the song he was living in the moment.  No made up stories, no false pretenses, just pure, raw emotion while in the fight for his life.  Passion is what fuels each and every one of our lives and when there is a bump in the road, take the lead and let your voice be heard such as he did.

Tim Johnson "One More" from Hickory Films on Vimeo.
Prayers today for Tim Johnson's family

I'd like just one more, please....

Peace,
Love,
Emotions,
Missing you Di,
Cat

Peace and Love To Paris

#PrayforParis ♥

Peace,
Love,
Prayers...
Cat

Saturday Memories

Di,

I’d give anything to hear your laugh again and to sip a cup of strong coffee with you

I despise fighting this world without you and I despise that you are not here to make things better for me

Quite selfish of me, I know but none of us deserved this outcome

The outcome of without you is not an outcome at all but rather a journey I have to continue on without my pal...

I remember when we took the infamous printing class and spent more time in idle chatter than actually doing type-press but we both loved it and the outcome was in a word...FAB 

We spent a lot of evenings in the studio working away until late in the night and for awhile I felt like I never wanted to see another type letter or have to put away another type letter....but alas you were always so positive, so confident, so overwhelmingly Di and you kept us pushing along even when the press did not want to work.  

When the ideas flowed, the coffee flowed and the time just disappeared.  I had a dream the other night that we were in the studio working and you were looking radiant and laughter filled the little cracks and crevices of the art room and it engulfed me in a huge hug.....it was FAB and I loved every moment of the dream moment and I was sad when I awoke and it was Friday, your birthday.....was that one of those nondescript signs you sent me? 

BTW I'm still waiting for you to pinch me really hard ..... what you told me you would do one day from heaven

Peace,

Love,

Enjoying the Joy

Tooling Through the Past,

Cat

...Birthday GIRL Di

TODAY is Di's Birthday.....no I have not forgotten and never will.
Posts have been almost non existent since last year.....funny how life gets in the way while you're trying to do good work.
I've been wearing my bracelet all week and thinking about the last time that I read that poem aloud just for Di.  Weighs heavy on my soul and in my heart and between the broken heartstrings.

I pondered about this posting for weeks trying to think of photos where I have them, which ones they are and if I had a particular photo.  Frustration set in when I realized that I really do not have as many pics of Di and I thought I did....

So, here is a favorite pic....one with that fabulous smile.

Happy birthday My Girl...My Di
Still miss you after all these years

Peace,
Tears,
Love,
Hugs,
Cat

Birthday Girl

This time of the year is difficult.  

The leaves are changing colors and falling swiftly from their branch counterparts.

The air has a deep chill of cold that is going to take some getting used to.

The sun is up later and tucks in for a nightly slumber much earlier.

And, this time of year reminds me of today and those fateful days following this day that Di was with us and then she was gone. Too quick, too short, too little time. 

I wish I could hang the stars up in the evening and sit under them with a hot cup of coffee and a sparkling redhead by my side giggling away.  

I can say I wish, I wish, I wish but it will do me no favors.  

I only hope that I never forget the times that I had with Di and how much I cherished them at the time and how much more I cherish them today. 

I constantly kick myself being a photographer and having so few pictures of Di.  I wish I could have the opportunity to take photos of Di again.....

So, today is the Di-girl's birthday and I will blow a kiss to the skies in the early morning and say a little prayer for my girl.....

Peace,

Love,

Hugs, 

And Remembrance....

Cath

So Tired and So Sad

Over the past few weeks things have been a bit daunting and with the rigors of the day and constant barrage of the nation news things could not look any bleaker so I have to say that I join Karen in saying I am tired too and sad and spending time in contemplation.
I am ALSO affected in my little corner of the world.

With the events of the past week, one sticks firmly in the grasp of my mind....
that quote by Robin Williams:

"No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world"  

With the events of the past week, I truly believe that the "ideas" that Robin Williams presented to the world truly did and will have an impact on changing the world if albeit a small percentage. 

We do not as outsiders know the reasons or the hows or whys of the situation and we never will but the one thing that I find troubling is the lack of respect and the lack of dignity that has unfolded in the media.

What do we need on this earth to grow and move past the issues, concerns, grief and sorrows?

Thyme - A TRUE healer in the plant world.....ironic
that TIME is also what helps the healing process....

We all need room to grow and we all need people (even though some of us think we can 'go it alone') and we need the caring and tenderness of the world to wrap it's arms around us and tell us it is going to be okay.
We need time to process the last few devastating weeks in our world and we all need to say a little prayer for those that are suffering because we can only imagine their pain and wish that they did not have to walk in their own shoes right now.
 
It is going to be okay...
It will be okay...
Peace...
Love...
Many hugs today and tomorrow...
Cath

Wednesdays Wisdom of The Heart

Enough Said...

Peace...
Love...
Cherished Thoughts Always...
Cath

Never Forget

I was waiting for the

Longest time, she said.

I thought you forgot, she said.

It is hard to forget, I said

When there is

Such an empty space

When you are gone….

A good cup of coffee and a good friend...I will never forget my first cup of coffee with Di

Wednesdays Wisdom of The Heart

Carry On Wayward Daughter.....

Peace...

Love...

Prayers...

Cath

PaPa Godspeed ...

In this crazy world that we live in there are so many times that time takes away and fills the spaces that should be reserved for those that we love.  We get busy with life and deadlines and appointments and the full plate of being an adult and lose focus.  And sometimes during the small moments we find in the out spaces of a day we reflect and remember those special times and realize that they WERE significant pieces of our lives.
I met a man several years ago that had a twinkle in his eye and a smile as big as the state of Texas and as he shook my hand with a strong grip he said that I was a "tall drink of water and a pretty one at that" and then he proceeded to hug me unconditionally.  This man was PaPa and I will never forget his stature and his presence and his kindness and his genuine soul that day that he welcomed me into "the family".

Over the years there were several phone conversations and a few times that I was able to see him and be entertained by his words and his stories.  I will never forget the bologna and mayo sandwich story at the BBQ restaurant, the fire ants at The Ranch, his prized bulls, reciting the ABC's backwards saying "I learned the alphabet backwards before I ever learned it forwards", his story about the 'hoosey goosey mountains',  the way that he would say "well, that's good" with such inflection, the selective hearing skills when the Dallas Cowboys were on tv, all the pets that the family had over the years since they once owned a pet store; namely a monkey that lived with the family and the wholesome and genuine concern that he had for everyone...all the time.  I cannot remember a time that I talked with him that he did not ask about how someone was doing.  It was just his nature, just PaPa...

PaPa was a true Texas gentleman with riches far more than gold or any monetary value.  He had a strong conscience and knew what was important in life....family and laughter and remembrance of times past.

I will hold those memories in my heart, in my thoughts and in my soul forever.  

"PaPa" Elmo 1920-2014

Today was the send off for PaPa....a fitting day; National Armed Services Day, a fitting tribute for a great man that has a legacy that will live on and on in the hearts and minds and souls of all that he touched.
Godspeed PaPa...you and the family have been in my thoughts all day.  I wish I could have been there.

We all loved you so very much...
Cath

Wednesdays Wisdom of The Heart

Peace...

Love...

Wheresoever you may go...

Cath

Another Mother's Day....

Without Di....

We sure miss that smile and those hugs she gave.....

Love....
Prayers....
Memories....
Pain of her loss still resonates....
Cath

Wednesdays Wisdom of The Heart.....

Di always gave GOOD.....




Peace...
Love...
Wishes...
Remembrances...
Cath

Happy Birthday Chloe.....

Another birthday another year gone so quickly....
I hope that today brings you good cheer, good friends and good memories!

 

Peace,
Love,
Memories and Hugs to you....
Cath

Listening Well.....Story People

Di LOVED Story People sayings....she introduced me to their little company years ago when it was just a little company with lots of words and colors and thoughts that were written by the heart for the heart.

This writing from Story People is exactly what I needed today.....it exemplifies Di

She had the gift of stopping time & listening well so that it was easy to hear who we could become & that was the future she held safe for each of us in her great heart & you may ask, what now? & I hope you understand when we speak softly among ourselves & do not answer just yet for our future is no longer the same without her.

I still find myself speaking softly to myself when I realize and know that I was so lucky to have lost such a good friend.....

Peace,
Love,
Hugs,
Wants & Needs Today,
Cath

Remembering

Some of the happy times....

Peace...
Love....
Rememberances...
Cath

Another Birthday....Emily

Em, I wish you a wonderful birthday today with thoughts and reflection and smiles and love....

Love is the magic that we hold in our hearts,
Time is only the vehicle of passage
Between yesterday, today and the future
Memories hold steadfast like a magnet to our hearts forever

Much love and wishes on YOUR day today,
Peace,
Cath

Merry Christmas To All and To All A Good Night

Here is to Christmas wishes, memories, remembrance and love today and always.

I received a wonderful gift today that reminds me of Di always.....it's from StoryPeople

I carry you 

with me into the world,

into the smell of the rain

and the words that dance 

between people

and for me it will 

always be this way, 

walking in the light

remembering 

being alive together.

I will never forget and will always remember and revel in the moments I had with Di over the years.
She is missed today especially on a day of celebration.

Peace....
Love....
Memories....
Tears....
Cath

Give Thanks Today

We are giving thanks today for the love and friendship we have in our lives....

Please carry a thankful heart not only today but every day.

Peace...
Love...
Hugs...
Thankfulness....
Cath

Ben - The Day To Celebrate YOUR Birthday

Ben,
Happy Birthday wishes to YOU today!
I will always remember the love in your mom's eyes in this picture...

Peace,
Good wishes,
Love and Hugs,
Cath

Walking



Peace, Love, Wishes and Longing....
Cath



Nothing Can Replace The Absence...

Four years ago today the world lost a very special woman, wife, mother, sister, aunt and friend...

Miss You, Di
The days go by so quickly but at least we have the memories.

I never want to forget that smile, ever...

“There is nothing that can replace the absence of someone dear to us, and one should not even attempt to do so. One must simply hold out and endure it. At first that sounds very hard, but at the same time it is also a great comfort. For to the extent the emptiness truly remains unfilled one remains connected to the other person through it. It is wrong to say that God fills the emptiness. God in no way fills it but much more leaves it precisely unfilled and thus helps us preserve -- even in pain -- the authentic relationship. Further more, the more beautiful and full the remembrances, the more difficult the separation. But gratitude transforms the torment of memory into silent joy. One bears what was lovely in the past not as a thorn but as a precious gift deep within, a hidden treasure of which one can always be certain.”

~ D. Bonhoeffer

The total number of days between Sunday, November 15th, 2009 and Friday, November 15th, 2013 is 1,461 days....The total time span from 2009-11-15 to 2013-11-15 is 35,064 hours....equivalent to 2,103,840 minutes.   You can also convert 1,461 days to 126,230,400 seconds...

Peace...

Love...

Hugs...

Tears...

Sadness...
Contemplation...

Cath

The Birthday Girl Sending Wishes To The Heavens...

Born on a Tuesday, October 16, 1962
Today would have been Di's 51st birthday and I am sure that she would have been dancing and laughing to no end.  She would have said things like "that's groovy" and "what a hoot" with her bright red hair rumbling around as she tossed her laughter throughout the room.

I so miss HER and I so WISH that things would have turned out differently....we always talked about being the old ladies together...hanging out drinking coffee on the porch and talking about the good old days.

Peace,

Love,

Kind Thoughts,

Memories and Tears...

Cath

Thoughts for Today

Peace...
Love...
Kindness...
Faith...
Cath

Remembering 9-11

Another year; cannot believe that this is the 12 year anniversary.
Such a sad day...
So many lost...
So many left behind...
Time heals the wound but never heals the loss...

We will never forget and will always remember.

Peace today and always,
Cath

Another Angel For Heaven

Another angel joined Di in heaven and we are so sad again. 

Linda "kay kay" was an important part of our family and she is missed so much.

A mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend...

She will forever be in our memories...

1944-2013

Peace...

Love...

Forever in our memory...

Cath

Happy Independence Day

Peace...
Love...
Safety...
Cath