3.01.2010

Signify

Tiny high pitched tears
hitting the ground like icicles being catapulted from a frozen roof to claim their space in the universe…….screaming out for forgiveness, searching for calmness, grasping for peace and all the while calling out for anyone that will listen
Could you hear my tiny high pitched tears this morning
before they hit the ground like torpedoes vaulting from the sky
They fell in the sink and in the shower and were washed down separate drains all emptying into one big hemisphere, joining all the others from the past since you left
tumbling through the hemisphere
wallowing in wet drippy biospheres
Did you see them
Did you feel them
Did you hear them

They fell steadily in streams like the ocean tide
Welling up and then bursting
I cry everyday
And it’s February already
At least once
If not more
Washing over my face like the holy water that was flung on your casket that fateful day
That changed my life
That changed all of our lives
My thoughts
My feelings

I find myself looking over my shoulder to catch a glimpse of you
Just a tiny one
But I can’t find you
Can’t see you
Can’t remember the last time we just chilled
Without the ugly green cancer monster glaring down
Waiting to pounce
I miss those times that
you were free
and carefree
and full of life without the needles and pokes and poison
You had a profound effect on me
On my wants
My needs
My what abouts and what nots
The” I didn’t have time” and the
“Sorry I missed you”
Just excuses of tiny tears
Lying in the potholes of life sinking further and further away from existence

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The people we meet form the foundation of our lives that when built upon allow us to bloom and blossom in ways that we never would have anticipated.